Quickies Are Fun: Oh No They Di'nt! Edition

Dr. Ginger Threatens Dr. Pepper

This is a month old, but this level of doucheyness does not diminish with time. It reads like a hoax post or an Onion article, but it seems to be the real (sad) deal. Speaking of Ging' N' Roses, Pauly T. recently had some choice words for the new album. And they involve Mortal Kombat and Double Gulps.

'Sleezus Fist And The Latter Day Taints' Is Already Taken

The A.V. Club does the internet a great annual service every year and provides a stellar comprehensive list of shitty band names. This year, they certainly don't disappoint. Though I always thought my girlfriend was just joking when she pointed and laughed at my usage of 'Lazersnake'.

'Worst Band of All-Time' Is Already Taken

In a what should come as a surprise to no one, Nickelback took home the title of the "Worst Lyrics of 2008" competition on The Village Voice's blog. The song is called...wait for it..."Something In Your Mouth". Ironically, it will make you wish there was something in Chad Kroeger's mouth for the duration of the song. Seriously, I heard this song in the car a few weeks ago, and thought I had accidentally switched stations to some sort of hard-rock parody station. The single verse and chorus I heard from this song was honestly worse than any music, voice, or sound for that matter, that I have heard in the past 14 years, at least. And my judgment was terrible, I'm sure, when I was 10, so I have to believe that this doesn't even compare to anything I think may have been worse back then. I'd rather smear a turd on my upper lip for a day than sit through the entirety of that garbage.